Your toddler’s social development

Your toddler’s social development is about how they connect with you and others, express their feelings, and begin to understand the world around them. As they grow, you may notice changes in their behaviour, emotions and relationships.

What you might notice

From around 4 to 12 months

• strong attachment to familiar adults
• enjoying smiles, games like peekaboo and copying facial expressions
• some anxiety around unfamiliar people

From around 12 to 24 months

• wanting independence ("me do it!")
• showing strong emotions such as frustration or excitement
• playing alongside other children (not always sharing yet)

From around 2 to 4 years

• wanting more independence but still needing reassurance
• playing alongside or beginning to play with others
• testing boundaries and saying "no"
• experiencing big feelings as they learn to manage emotions

All children follow their own path, and progress can come in bursts. 

Development review

Every child has a 2 to 2 and a half year development review. Find out more about this on Oxford Health. This will be organised through your health visitor or midwife.   

Why social development matters

Social development helps your child to:

• build relationships and feel secure
• understand and manage their emotions
• learn how to play and interact with others
• develop confidence and independence

These early experiences help shape your child's wellbeing, behaviour and future learning.

How you can support your toddler

You don't need lots of equipment or structured activities. Simple, everyday interactions make a big difference.

Build strong relationships

• spend time playing and interacting together
• respond to your child's needs and cues
• offer comfort and reassurance when they need it

Support emotions and behaviour

• name feelings simply ("you're feeling cross")
• stay calm and consistent
• praise positive behaviour and effort

Use routines and boundaries

• keep routines fairly predictable so your child feels safe
• set clear, simple boundaries
• offer choices where you can

Encourage social interaction

• give opportunities to play with other children
• model sharing, turn-taking and kindness
• talk about what's happening during play 

Trust your instincts – you know your child best

You may want to speak to someone if:

• you’re concerned about your child's behaviour or emotional development
• your child finds it difficult to connect or respond to others
• you feel their social development is not progressing

You don't need to wait. Speak to your health visitor or GP if you have any questions. Visit Oxfordshire's local offer for advice on the questions to ask.

Resources and support

• Learning conversations and telling stories: 3 to 5 years - Best Start in Life - NHS. Get activities and tips to boost learning, communication and early development
• Speech and Language UK - advice if parents are concerned about talking, understanding or communication
• Speech and Language Therapy - Children's Integrated Therapies- Local NHS referral information and support
• Contact - advice, support and helplines for families with disabled children
• Family Information Service - find a range of activities. Meeting new friends and getting out and about can be a great way to build confidence and develop communication skills

Pop into one of our family hubs 

Family hubs provide ongoing support after your baby arrives, including activities, family services and opportunities to meet other parents. 

Want to find out more about what comes next? 

Growing up, from toddlers to preschool – their development stages and what to expect.